I’ve been driving myself pretty hard…kind of like a track car that doesn’t know how to operate outside the redline. All my handling feels sloppy at a slower pace, and I miss the adrenaline. I realized yesterday afternoon that I really hadn’t broken my racing patterns — I was pursuing social engagements and job search with the same reckless focus as I’d devoted to my work.
I’ve resolved to slow down a little, and to allow more space without social or professional commitments over the next couple of weeks. I need time without people and without the demands of interaction to relax, to heal myself from the frenetic pace of life, and to hear my very quiet inner voices. I also need time to love myself and my partner — I’m pretty sure driving us at this pace hasn’t been positive for either of us.
So, for now, I’m seeking a little love and a little less go-go.